“Ex Girlfriend Blocked My Number”

Whenever a student emails me saying “my ex girlfriend blocked my number”…the series of events that led to that situation sounds very familiar.

Step 1: Girl becomes distant
Step 2: Boy keeps sending her texts
Step 3: Girl pulls away even more
Step 4: Boy keeps crowding her space and asking “what’s wrong?”
Step 5: Girl blocks Boy’s number as her attraction sinks even more

Once your ex girlfriend blocks your number, it’s like you’re stuck in a hole you can’t get out of.

You feel that you MUST do everything you can to get this girl back.

But if you are unable to contact her, and you are denied of your efforts… how will it be possible to get her back?

The key is to realize that contacting her is the thing that pushed her away.

The Only Way Forward is to Create Space

If your girlfriend broke up with you, or became very distant saying she wants “space and time”…

…you must give her that space, or it will STOP her from regaining feelings for you again.

You see, when a girl seeks space, yet you keep chasing, something in her brain makes her resent you. She becomes annoyed that you keep pursuing.

The main reason she gets annoyed is huge, which I reveal in the answer to the first question below.

(By the way, this video teaches you little-known techniques to “re-wire” your ex’s feelings and make her want you back)

Now let’s go through Question #1… (which I got as an email from our good friend Stanley)

Question #1: Ex Girlfriend Blocked My Number and Acts Like She Lost Interest

It’s quite a long story so I’ll try to keep it as short as possible.

My girlfriend has two kids with another man but she’s always letting him back into her life…

For example, she lets him stay over her house on some nights.

She tells me it’s just so he can see the kids but he has his own house. She says there’s nothing going on between them but every time he’s there she blocks my number, like she’s hiding me from him.

She works with this other guy at work and she is far too close to him but I honestly believe there’s something going on there too.

She only ever seems to want money from me… like she’s always asking me. Sometimes just wish I could have a normal chat with her without talking about money.

She also keeps me a secret to the world, and just keeps saying the timing is not right especially with the kids because they wouldn’t take it very well… but we’ve been together for a year.

I’ve been ringing her since January and she won’t speak to me for two months.

She just texts instead, like she’s just lost interest.

But if we ever go out together, afterwards she’s texting me all the time saying how amazing I am… but then after a week she goes cold again.

Recently, she blocked my number, and when I asked her why she blocked me, she replied with a message treating me like dirt and blaming me for things I didn’t do, like I’m a complete different person.

So I said to myself “enough is enough” so when she unblocked me I called her… obviously getting no answer… but I left her a voicemail being very respectful but basically saying it’s over.

Now I hate myself for this but I blocked her number and went into no contact. I said to myself “if she loves me she’ll come back to me and make an effort”.

My question is, was I right by doing this?

Thanks Frankie

– Stanley

My Reply: She Doesn’t Respect You and You Let Her Use You

Hey Stanley,

You should have cut her off long ago.

You don’t want her to use you just for money, it sets you up for manipulation, and she’ll think of you as the “money guy” instead of the lover. You want her to love you for your character and not what you can provide.

Another thing to avoid in the future is when you keep pursuing when a girl has gone cold.

When you keep contacting a girl even though she never picks up, it stops her from regaining feelings of attraction.

You must let her come to you, as explained in this article.

Because when you keep chasing, it only pushes her away even further…

And it makes her annoyed by you.

This is why it makes sense she blocked your number, treated you like dirt, and started random arguments, blaming you for stuff you never did.

Next time a girl goes distant… sit back, give her time to breathe, and let her initiate contact.

The final move you made was inevitable, although it would have been smoother and better if you did it earlier.

See, earlier in the relationship you probably had that feeling that she was treating you unfairly, but that feeling wasn’t “released”.

For example…

There were opportunities to respect yourself by not repeatedly contacting a girl who was ignoring you… and opportunities to assert yourself and say “no” whenever she wanted a favor involving money… or opportunities to say “this isn’t acceptable” whenever she treated you poorly.

You didn’t assert yourself early, so all of it got bottled up, until you did assert yourself, and it all got released at the end like a volcano.

This is good though, because it’s better late than never.

It’s also a good opportunity to learn for the future.

A girl cannot love you if she doesn’t respect you. And a girl won’t respect you if you don’t respect yourself.

The moment I sensed she completely lost respect for you was when you said she treated you like a “completely different person”…that’s because your image in her eyes had shifted.

And when a girl loses respect for you, she gets more easily annoyed by random things you do that don’t even matter. 

If your image changes back to something she can respect, that can also seem like a black and white change, but this time she would treat you like someone worthy of respect.

Respecting yourself means not taking second-class treatment.

Right now, that means self-improvement and doing stuff for yourself… physically, mentally, and learning to generate positive emotions on your own. Be self-dependent.

Go no contact with her until she reaches out. I suggest not blocking numbers as that closes every door of communication. (Related: Should You Block Your Ex On Social Media?)

Mostly importantly… start seeing other women who treat you MUCH BETTER.

Next, in Question #2, I discuss…

• Why you shouldn’t rush a relationship
• Why a girl blocks your number
• Your plan to get her back when she’s cut all communication ties

Question #2: She Blocked My Number But not on Social Media

Hey Frankie,

I’m in a dilemma. There’s this girl I’ve been talking to for a while now.

Everything between us was cool and everything was rolling smoothly.

We were talking damn near every day… but then last week she just starts distancing herself.

I confronted her about it and she said she is dwelling about her past relationship. She said that for now we should just remain friends because she wasn’t ready for anything emotional because of the drama stemming from her past relationship 

I really really do like this girl.

For the last week I can’t stop talking about her and I can’t stop thinking about her.

I recently hit her up asking how she’s doing, and asking her if she needs anything. I told her I’m there for her because her ex boyfriend posted a video of her having a mental break down.

After I texted her that,  I came to find my ex girlfriend blocked my number but not on social media. Then just today she deletes everything she had posted off her social media.

I want to stay in contact with her and hopefully win her back… but I really can’t do that if she’s cutting all ties of communication.

What do you think I should do? Can you help me out here?

Ivan

My Reply: Texting Every Day Made Her Pull Away

Hey Ivan, talking every day is a red flag warning that the girl will pull away.

The reason is that talking every day is unsustainable and the girl at some point will feel the need to back off.

If you’re always eager to be in her life, chances are she will soon feel overwhelmed, smothered, and it will make her want space away from you.

If she gets smothered enough it’ll make her block your number and social media.

That’s why at the beginning of a new “relationship”, I suggest that you don’t talk everyday, because that kills the mystery. I also suggest that you only see her once a week.

So
1. Make your dates only once a week (hang out, have fun, hook up)
and…
2. Create space in between those dates, by not texting too much in between

What to do Now That She’s Fading Away

DO NOT try to stay in contact with her as an attempt to get her attention again.

You must give her the space she needs and let her come to you.

If she doesn’t get that space, she’ll distance herself from you even more.

That’s why she blocked your number.

Instead, go no contact until she reaches out.

Two articles I suggest to read:

1. https://championsofmen.com/when-a-girl-says-shes-not-ready-for-a-relationship/

This one’s similar to your situation. She likes you, but isn’t ready for a serious relationship.

This article talks about the “no contact” approach you should take:

2. https://championsofmen.com/will-no-contact-make-her-move-on-will-your-ex-forget-about-you-and-fade-away-forever/

It talks about going no contact.

You might think that you need to stay in contact with her to avoid her fading away for good… but that is your mind tricking you to reach out at her… which would make the situation worse.

(Also the “Ex Factor” program shows you little known techniques to “rewire” your ex’s feelings and make her want you back)

Next in Question #3, I talk about:

• How not applying “no contact” can get you stuck in the “friend zone” with your ex girlfriend. 
• The mistake of doing favors for your ex or buying her stuff as an attempt to get her back.
• How to escape being in “limbo” with your ex girlfriend and going back to being more than just friends… and the “sacrifice” you have to make.

Question #3: Ex Blocked My Number and then Unblocked Me, but Now I’m Stuck in the Friend Zone

What’s up Frankie, I read your article and all of your information makes perfect sense to me.

I have always considered myself to be good at understanding females and the laws of attraction.

About 2 months ago my girlfriend of 4 years (let’s call her Sarah) told me that she needed a break from just the general stress of life and from me.

I had made the common mistake of hounding her with questions like “what’s wrong?” and begging and pleading her to stay.

It definitely made the situation a lot worse. I continued to chase for about a month, while still seeing her; giving her rides to work, hanging out and talking, taking her to see her mother, and sending huge paragraph texts about how much I love her.

My efforts were going nowhere, and my emotions got the best of me.

I had wound up reaching out to someone from my past, (someone who Sarah strongly despises, we’ll call her Mary) and I wound up hanging out with Mary for the next two to three weeks.

During that short time frame, word of us hanging out got back to Sarah, and she reached out in anger twice. Both times I denied it, which resulted in Sarah blocking me on all social media platforms.

Mary had caused problems in Sarah and I’s relationship 2 years ago, causing Sarah and me to not speak to each other for three months before I texted her on her birthday.

Since my girlfriend blocked me, I have cut off all communication with Mary.

After about a week I wrote Sarah a heartfelt letter of all the good times we’ve had over the course of the 4 years we’ve been together, and I left it in her mailbox.

She read it and reached out to me within just a couple of hours.

When she reached out to me, she told me that my letter was very sweet and she definitely remembers all the good times we had together, but she didn’t want to fight over me anymore with Mary and that Mary could have me.

I told Sarah that I had no intentions of getting in a relationship with Mary and that she was only an emotional support friend.

Sarah then told me that she wants to be single and needs time to find what makes her happy and have a purpose again and to not have to depend on a man for happiness.

I respected her wishes this second time around but made the mistake of agreeing with her request to just be friends.

I told her that I’m not going anywhere and still want her all to myself whenever she was ready to love again.

Since then, we talk just about every day while she’s at work, but then after work I am left hanging.

I haven’t brought up any feelings since that day. She had been telling me she wanted an expensive computer so she could start making youtube videos and asked me to check prices for her while she was at work.

I thought it would be a huge surprise to buy it for her, so I did and give it to her after work.

She said she loved it and gave me a huge hug.

Yesterday, although reluctantly at first, she agreed to come meet my mother for the first time. The whole time she was discussing memories with me and common interests with each other.

My question to you is from this point how do I manage to shift things from platonic back to romantic?

Keep in mind she is an extremely loving and emotional person.

We were very sexually active before and she tells me she isn’t sleeping around with anyone.

We only communicate now when she reaches out to me first.

I am currently working on setting up a meet up where I can spark the attraction again and make her feel the emotions that she had felt so heavily just two months ago.

Any comments, advice, or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Sorry for the lengthy message, just devastated by this loss and willing to go to the furthest extent to make this relationship work.

– Travis

My Reply: Avoid the Following Mistakes

Hey Travis, you are still making several big mistakes.

Like

1. Agreeing to be friends
   You want to show you’re interested as a lover, but not as a friend — however don’t try to get the relationship label back either
2. Talking to her every day
   This makes it impossible for mystery to set in and allow her to think about you while you’re away. You also run the risk of coming off clingy and making her feel smothered. You’ll be stuck in the friend zone but unable to make the jump to the lover zone.
3. Buying her expensive stuff
   Using external material things in order to “buy her back” doesn’t work and can come off as manipulative, even if you didn’t mean it in that way. Or she’ll just use you and you’ll end up with nothing.
4. Writing her a sweet letter telling her you have no intentions of dating others and want her all to yourself.
   This pegs you as a “sure thing” for her, and gives her no incentive to chase. Generally, you shouldn’t write your ex girlfriend a letter.

However, you are aware of many of these mistakes.

Now you have to decide whether you want her as a lover, or just a friend.

While being in her “friend zone” means she’ll give you validation and you’ll feel good… being a friend is all you’ll be.

Transcending to the “lover zone” will give you short-term friction during the transition. It’s a sacrifice you have to make to get what you truly want.  She might stop acting nice and stop “validating” you as a friend (though you shouldn’t be dependent on female validation to begin with)

But the question is…

Do you want to play to WIN, or to “feel good” in the short term?

Start by not texting her every single day. Actually, go no contact until she initiates. Then when she does, invite her over and create opportunities for “getting physical” to happen.

When you hang out, don’t focus on getting the “relationship label” back, and don’t have any serious conversations, or you’ll push her away. Only focus on having fun and hooking up.

If she doesn’t want to do this, then say you’re interested in her only as a lover, but not as a purely platonic friend.

And feel free to hang out with Mary, don’t avoid hanging out with people just to please this girl.

Notice how emotional she got when you hung out with Mary.

Start thinking of yourself and your needs first. You want to play to win for yourself, not to please others. Don’t compromise yourself.

And if you want to re-attract your girlfriend back to you (and I’m guessing you do, or you wouldn’t be reading so deep into this article 😉 )… then you should watch this video here:

Free Video: How to Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

It reveals a simple series of steps you can take… starting right now… to “re-attract” your ex girlfriend and change the way she feels about you.

==> Watch it Here