Breaking news…
You recently found out that your ex girlfriend is dating another guy.
It breaks your heart that the girl who was once YOURS, now belongs to someone else.
You feel she has forgotten you so much that she is now starting a new love with a new guy…
And it really hurts.
You feel hurt, gutted, and jealous every time you think of them together.
If you’re in this situation, listen up…
Because while it is one of the worse pains you’ve felt in your life… in this article I want to talk about how to make progress in getting over her, how to recover, and even how to set yourself up to make a comeback and possibly win her back again.
Our good friend Mario is in this very situation, let’s now go over his question…
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Question: Ex Girlfriend Dating Another Guy
So here is the story: About 2 months after the break up, I notice a certain guy start commenting under her pictures. This guy lives in Germany.
I immediately felt that something was “wrong”…
I asked her mom, her friends, her family: Who is this guy?
Because I always told them to tell me if they have bad news for me.
Everyone knew that I loved her and that I wanted her back, but they never answered my question about who this guy was.
So just before the visit I saw she was in Germany again.
I asked her brother and then he told me the truth: That they’ve been in a relationship for a while now
This made me very angry at everyone.
She broke up with me for the reason that she wants to enjoy the single life and travel… but just barely two months later she in a relationship again.
I know it means that she doesn’t want a relationship with ME, but i don’t like it when someone is lying to me.
I don’t know how serious this relationship is because as I said the guy lives in Germany and she is in the UK.
I was angry at her family because they had no balls to tell me the truth and stop me from false hoping.
I decided it’s time to end this: I told her mum I don’t want to talk with them anymore and I told the same to her.
Just before the visit I told her that I decided I don’t want to meet her anymore and I don’t want her to reach out to me anymore. I deleted her from Facebook, her phone number etc. She said she respects my decision.
I know it’s the worst thing to do but now I just feel emptiness and pain.
I know I must not think like this, but I tried to date other girls but we had absolutely no chemistry. I just feel nothing can make me happy.
The roadtrips, traveling, friends… nothing.
I feel this was the right thing to do but now I feel I lost her forever. I don’t know why I still feel this “oneitis” for her but I feel that if I’d see her with someone else it would break my heart.
Please if you have anymore advice that I could do for this case just tell me. If not then thank you for your help.
I hope you will answer!
Kind regards!
Mario
My Reply: Correct These Mistakes to Win Her Back From the New Guy
1. Properly Going Through the “No Contact” Phase of Getting Her Back
Hey Mario,
After you break up with an ex girlfriend and as you’re going through the “no contact” period… I strongly advise against talking with her family or any of her close friends, especially with the intent of getting “intelligence” or gossip about what your ex is doing.
This goes against the nature of “no contact”, your ex can sense it, her family will tell her they spoke with you, and she’ll get the impression you’re using them to influence getting back together with her.
It sends signals to her that still never got over her, and that she’s still in your mind.
And if she’s constantly getting signals that you’re going around asking about her… then you’ll never create the space required for her to miss you and wonder about you.
So not properly going through the “no contact” process greatly hurt your chances of getting her back.
It is barely NOW, several months later, that you’re getting the emotional leverage to actually cut ties with them… but in an angry scorned ex boyfriend kind of way that shows you’re really not over her.
Also, you shouldn’t Facebook/Instagram stalk her in an effort to see if she’s seeing other people. In your case, you were like Sherlock Holmes looking at her pictures and “connecting the dots” on who the guy commenting was… and when you do that there’s no way you’ll actually recover and get over her. (Recovering and getting over her is what gives you the best chance of getting her back later).
Related: What to do When Your Girlfriend Breaks Up With You
Next… let’s go over some female psychology.
2. The REAL Reason She Broke Up With You
When she told you the reason she broke up with you, it’s the reason she felt IN THAT MOMENT.
It doesn’t mean she won’t get a boyfriend a relatively short time later.
And chances are, she hooked up with guys while traveling and partying, that’s something that made her feel free. It’s just now that she’s got an “official” boyfriend. So I don’t see it as “lying” since that includes intent.
But all of that doesn’t matter if you’re not creating attraction in her.
She said she didn’t know why she acted that way with you, or why she lost attraction.
That’s because women act based on what they feel and most of the time they don’t even know WHY they feel like they do and why they do what they do.
They go with what they FEEL when in a relationship with you… and she didn’t FEEL the right kind of masculine energy from you.
So the reason women give for wanting to break up is something that needs to be taken with a grain of salt… because many times even they aren’t sure why they felt like they do!
The real reason is “loss of attraction” one way or another.
Now it seems that it has taken you a really long time to get over her.
It was a rejection and recovery period that was drawn out over several months, with you still clinging on to hope… which is why it was a really big shock when you found out your ex girlfriend has a new boyfriend.
When guys write me saying “ex girlfriend dating another guy”… it usually means they now have “emotionally leverage” to finally move on and do what it takes to recover and make themselves attractive again.
Related: How to Use Emotional Leverage to Bounce Back From a Breakup
How to Get Over Ex Dating a New Guy
Hint: Meet new girls and get laid.
Is your ex girlfriend dating another guy? Then you’re probably angry, hurt, and prepared to do whatever it takes to get better with women and dating.
You are tired of this shit and you are “all systems go” to take the necessary steps to make a comeback from this.
The first step is to make a SHIFT in your mindset.
Right now, your head is in a scarcity mentality with “THAT ONE GIRL” you’re obsessed about…
You’re in an intense cloud of emotions where you feel she is the one… and you have these grandiose romantic fantasies about her. It’s like you’re in a movie and you’re the main character that has to win her over.
But this state of mind isn’t doing anything for you.
It’s a state of mind that WEAKENS you as a man…
It makes you unknowingly do needy shit, and it makes you come off as a clingy, emotionally insecure little boy.
Women HATE this stuff. It makes them shiver with the heebie-jeebies… and it makes them want to RUN AWAY.
However, nothing kicks you out of that toxic state of mind better than meeting new girls and getting laid.
When your mind opens up to seeing that you have more female options… then the scarcity oneitis disappears and you stop being addicted to the one girl.
And then you stop acting like a wuss, and you start being attractive again!
