How to Turn Your Female Friend Into Your Girlfriend

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Tired of being stuck in the friend zone with that amazing girl you really like?

If you keep getting friend-zoned by women, It’s probably because you’re doing specific behaviors (which you don’t realize) that are making her think of you only as a FRIEND.

Keep struggling, or flip the situation around and get her to start thinking of you as a LOVER.

Here’s how to turn your female friend into your girlfriend

Question: How to Turn a Friend into a Girlfriend?

I am 22 years old. I am very shy and I am introverted. When I have women as friends, I am always in the friend zone.

There’s a particular girl I talk to, and we always talk about school, work, or something that happened.

That’s it.

It’s like impossible to me to talk more intimate with women. I also observed that they always want to be just my friend.

My entire life was like women and I have to go to school together, work together, share acquaintances, share friends, and that’s it.

Me as a potential boyfriend… I was NEVER in that place.

I am tired of seeing other men have a girlfriend like it’s a very normal thing.

To me, it’s almost impossible to have a girlfriend. The reason is, I always stay in a my corner.

In addition, the few female friends that I have just consider me like I was one of their female friends.

I am not effeminate and I am handsome enough. However, the women I know always prefer other men.

It sounds like I am not a man to them.

It seems that they just see me as a friend and just a friend.

It looks like I will never be enough for a woman to be her boyfriend.

I am desperate and depressed. I have never seen a sign that a woman or a girl of my entourage likes me as a man that can be their boyfriend.

– Jean

My Reply: To Turn Friends into Girlfriends, Take More Risks

Jean – when I read this, I thought: “he isn’t being aggressive enough” and “he doesn’t *get* how attraction works”

There are two big mistakes guys make that completely demolish the chances they have to attract a girl.

Mistake #1: They Wait Too Much for “Proof” That a Girl Likes Them Before Making a Move On Them

You won’t have success by sitting around all day waiting for the girl to make a move on you.

You have to be willing to take control of the situation and guide it to where you want it to go.

Critical to this is communicating your intent early.

If you act like you want to be her nice friend, and you try to “play it safe” by not suggesting that you’re attracted to her, then she’ll quickly put you in her “nice” friend category.

But…

When you act like you want to be her LOVER, then you act differently.

You show more intent, you aren’t afraid to take risks, and you are SHAMELESS when it comes to expressing your desire.

Because it’s what you want and you OWN it.

This SHIFT in communication gets you different results.

By expressing your intent, you don’t waste your time with women who aren’t what you want and instead you attract the women that you have a chance with.Because if they know you like her, and they’re still hanging out with you… then you know that there’s a great chance they like you too.

What’s the effect of this? Less women will end up being your friend (that wasn’t your intent anyways so who cares)… but you will notice more women getting “feelings” for you and wanting to be your girlfriend.

Keep in mind though, that you also need to know the fundamental basics of how attraction works, otherwise you’ll commit mistake #2…

Mistake #2: Revealing Your Feelings For Her in a “Weak”, Low-Status Way

I know, I know, I mentioned in mistake #1 how men aren’t aggressive enough and never make a move on a girl.But if you show intent the WRONG way, you’ll make a woman run away from you fast.

Because women aren’t attracted to men who don’t value themselves and who act WEAK.

It’s an undisputed universal truth.

Now, when a guy (who acts too much like a wussy)… falls in love with a girl… and then reveals his feelings for her… the same typical tragic story follows. And I bet you’ve experienced it. Just like I have.

Wanna hear it?

Here’s how it goes…

The 15 Step Story of How “Wussy” Men Typically Meet, Fall in Love, and Reveal Their Feelings For a Woman

  1. you meet a girl
  2. you start getting “feelings” for her
  3. she gives you “mixed signals”
  4. sometimes it feels like she likes you, other times she treats you no more than just a friend
  5. these mixed signals keep hammering your thinking with emotions…
  6. you start getting a “Psychic Tension”
  7. as the psychic tension inside you accumulates, you get a strong urge to break this tension and reveal how you feel for her.
  8. you reveal your feelings to her, accompanied
    possibly with a “Grand Gesture” where you buy her flowers, give her a gift, write her a poem, or draw a portrait of her face, etc…
  9. she says she doesn’t feel the same way about you and gives you the “let’s just be friends talk”
  10. you feel heartbroken
  11. you move on
  12. you recover
  13. you meet a new girl
  14. you start getting feelings for her
  15. and the cycle goes on…

Is any of this ringing a bell?

If it is, then I can totally relate to what you’re going through.

Because I’ve been through all this myself.

Yes, I’ve even done the drawing a portrait of her face “grand gesture” move. (that’s a story for a different newsletter)

But the critical question now is:

How do you break this cycle and start becoming more than “just a friend” with the women you meet?

Here’s how to turn your female friend into your girlfriend…

You know how in steps 5-7 above I mention the “psychic tension” you feel when you start to constantly obsess over a girl and think about her all the time?

You have to FLIP IT AROUND.

You want to instead be the one who gives HER that“Psychic Tension” in her mind, such that she feels irresistibly attracted to you.

How?

My friends Bobby and Rob discovered that there are 12 specific attraction weapons you can use over and over again to create this psychic tension in her mind.

They figured out a specific sequence to use these attraction weapons.

And they called it “The Scrambler”

==> Learn More About The Scrambler Here

If you want to escape the friend zone with “that one girl” who keeps tugging at your heart strings…

The Scrambler is the ultimate weapon that transforms her mind and gets her to start feeling attraction for you.

Until she starts picturing you as someone she might get romantic or sexual with, rather than just thinking of you as a nice, normal friend.

That’s how to turn your female friend into your girlfriend.

Turning a Friend into a Lover When You’re Stuck in the Friend Zone

If you feel stuck in the friend zone with a girl you like, but you want to turn her into a lover, then listen up

When you are in the friend zone, it means you are following a “pattern of interaction” that doesn’t serve you.

See, there’s pattern of interaction between you and a girl that gets set very early when you meet her.

If the pattern is “friend to friend”, then the pattern of acting as “just friends” will likely continue.

That’s why you should introduce flirting and man-to-woman communication soon after meeting a girl. This is more likely to lead to the “lover zone”.

If you try just being her friend first to “play it safe” and then you decide you want to go for her, it may be awkward and shocking to change gears later.

But let’s say you’re in the friend zone right now, and you want her… what do you do?

It’s time to change the pattern of interaction.

This pattern is very hard to change, unless you know the steps of what to do.

If you keep acting the same, things will not progress, you won’t go for what you want, and you’ll feel stuck.

The “Rules” of the Pattern of Interaction

Your interaction pattern follows specific rules.

These are rules of supplication where you subconsciously value a girl more than you.

It’s very subtle and you don’t know you’re doing it, but it’s there… and the girl feels it at a subconscious level too.

Take some time to write down the rules you follow… so that you can break them. The more specific, the better.

You Have to Break These Rules to Change Her Perception of You

Let’s say a girl sends mixed signals. She might be somewhat interested, but you are not a priority to her.

You both follow rules that frame this.

For example, a rule can be that whenever she texts you, you quickly reply… but whenever you text her, she takes a long time to respond… and with short replies.

There’s an imbalance of investment here. You’re putting in more effort than her which means you value her more than she values you.

You Must Break the Rule That You Invest More Than She Does

So you decide to make a change. From now on, you’re going to match and mirror her behavior, responses, and length of texts.

If she’s less available, so will you. If she invests less, so will you.

What’s interesting is that you’ll probably feel weird doing this. This period can feel unnatural because you’re used to replying right away and texting her more often.

But you must hold the line.

Remember, you have to match her availability and investment in order to break the rule.

Right now you’re more available to her and you’re putting more effort than she does. She isn’t as eager to talk to you as you are to talk to her… therefore, she doesn’t value you as much as you value her.

If you keep perpetuating the rule that she’s more important, then her view of you won’t change and she will still think of you as just a friend.

One way to make her value you more, is to control the attention you give her.

Attention is Your #1 Asset

Value your attention by giving it to those who value it.

A man who values himself doesn’t give his attention to just anyone.

Whenever someone stops giving you their attention, remove yours and walk away until they start valuing you again.

When you make this switch in focus, you’ll become less available and more scarce to a girl who faded away… which will make the attention you give her go up in value from her point of view.

This is one reason why no contact works to get a fading girl or an ex girlfriend back.

Use it to make a female friend value you more and possibly turn her into a girlfriend or lover.

Is this manipulation to try to get her attention? No. You are merely valuing yourself by giving your attention to those who value it… and removing it from those who take you for granted.

This naturally makes you more scarce to women who don’t value you, and increases the value of your attention… which gives them a chance to gain attraction for you.

You Will Face Resistance When You Start Breaking Rules

If you want to go from the guy she takes for granted, to the guy she’s romantically and sexually interested in, it will take sacrifice, testicular fortitude, and tolerance to discomfort.

Let’s say you want to break the friend zone.

You’ve had it and don’t care about “friendship” anymore.

You want the lover zone… because you want glory.

You want to live your dream and go for what you really want in life.

But you can’t reach the top without sacrifice.

Let’s say there’s a pattern where you talk or hang out with this girl you like.

Whenever you talk or hang out with her, it feels good… but you want more so you want to take the steps that break you out of the friend zone.

Here you’ll face some resistance.

Right now, you’re used to her presence in your life. Her texts and calls give you validation.

The friend zone is a “comfort zone”. To go for your ultimate goal, you have to break out of this comfort zone.

Which means you’ll endure discomfort.

You’ll feel validation “withdrawal” when you go distant.

Yes you’ll take away the attention you give her… but the validation you get from talking to her will also go away. It’s a two-way street.

You’ll have to withstand the emptiness and go through this withdrawal period where you feel a lonely void because you’re not talking to her anymore like before.

By not talking, I mean you’re not initiating conversations like before, because remember you’re only going to invest in her as much as she invests in you.

You are matching and mirroring her investment… giving her your attention only if she gives you hers. This is making your attention more scarce, making it go up in value. Value your time and attention, it’s your #1 asset.

So as you feel this void of not talking to her, you have to walk through the desert for a bit, until you re-learn to generate positive emotions on your own.

This is a test of your masculine strength.

Will you cave to the pressure and return to the warm comfort of the friend zone where you feel safe but never go for your dream?

Or will you endure the discomfort because the friend zone is ultimately not what you want?

Ignore internal doubts telling you she’ll fade away. In reality, this “detox” makes her fade away in YOUR mind. You’ll still like her, but you’ll take her off the pedestal.

Do you think perhaps you’re addicted to the romantic fantasy you have of her and don’t want to lose it?

Reality is what matters. Stop living in hope.

Sometimes the fantasy world gives us dopamine for things that never happen, and it stops us from making it happen in reality, because in our dreamworld it semi-happened and we feel good about it.

The fundamentals determine reality, not wishful thinking.

If you’re in the “friend zone” with a female friend, you can turn her into your lover by using a sneaky little mind game called The Scrambler.

Have a look at this video to see what I mean.

 

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